BY FRAN JEWELL
The relationship we have with our dog is probably the number one concern most dog owners have with their dogs. Owners want to provide comfortable beds, nourishing food, fun toys, lots of exercise in beautiful areas, and mental enrichment for their dogs.
It is true that our relationship is the prime ingredient to a happy life for dog and owner together. There must be something positive that keeps us in love with each other.
Building a nurturing relationship is not always what it seems to be. While all of those things I mentioned above are supremely important, one of the most vital things you can do is build communication with your dog and to understand what pack animals need. We are a different species from dogs. What we think would be good for a dog is probably far from the truth about what dogs really NEED to be happy.
Dogs are pack animals. Period. There are no ifs, ands or buts about that. They are still 99.9 percent the same genetically as the wolf. Even the most beautiful tiny poodle has pack needs in order to be happy. Pack needs does NOT mean being around other dogs all the time. Somehow we humans have begun to think that all dogs need to have play dates and other dog friends no matter what to be happy. The reality is that what every dog needs is a leader—not an “alpha,” but a kind, firm and fair leader. Dogs need someone that gives them kind direction and rules. Yup. They need YOU to provide them with the security that you will protect them, and guide them so they don’t make decisions based on their wolf inheritance, like biting, nipping, bullying, or being territorial or possessive. Giving any dog complete freedom to make its own decisions is a sure way to instill anxiety that becomes ever so hard to change.
The key to a healthy relationship with your dog is to be sure you have solid communication tools. Interestingly enough, obedience training is top on the list for nurturing communication. Dogs desperately want to understand you. They do as much of that by watching your body language as they do their own species. But, when you show them things you want them to do, they become happy, zestful in life, fun to live with and we nurture their need to understand what we want from them. Dogs are natural workers. They WANT to work for us humans. The reason we domesticated dogs was to have them work for us by helping us hunt for food, gather our livestock, protect our families, rid our ranches of vermin, right alongside being loving companions in our homes.
When we give dogs communication tools, or simple “obedience” skills, they feel proud, helpful and so much more a part of our families. For me, when I teach one of my dogs to do something, whatever it is, I learn so much about him. I learn how many repetitions he needs to solidify the behavior. I learn if he is stubborn, or easy to train. I learn to respect him for who he is. And, we learn together how to engage safely and confidently in our world together.
When I say “obedience,” it’s really about any training, whether it is home manners, competition tracking or agility, or just to go get the paper in the morning. Obedience is not a militaristic come, sit, down. It is teaching dogs our language so that they can be peaceful and confident in our world.
So, if you think that having a good relationship with your dog is giving him all the freedom he wants, you might think again. Is he a human? What is it your dog really needs from you? He needs direction to feel safe, loved and comfortable.
Fran Jewell is an Idaho Press Club award-winning columnist, IAABC-certified dog behavior consultant, NADOI-certified instructor #1096 and the owner of Positive Puppy Dog Training, LLC, in Sun Valley. For more information, visit positivepuppy.com or call (208) 578-1565