{"id":15412,"date":"2021-02-09T20:57:54","date_gmt":"2021-02-09T20:57:54","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/?p=15412"},"modified":"2021-02-09T20:57:54","modified_gmt":"2021-02-09T20:57:54","slug":"mrs-malaprop-reborn","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/2021\/02\/09\/mrs-malaprop-reborn\/","title":{"rendered":"Mrs. Malaprop Reborn"},"content":{"rendered":"

By JoEllen Collins<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"
JoEllen Collins\u2014a longtime resident of the Wood River Valley\u2014is a teacher, writer, fabric artist, choir member and unabashedly proud grandma known as \u201cBibi Jo.\u201d<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

One of my favorite literary characters probably appealed to me because, even as a girl, I sensed that I was afflicted with the same malady. Of course, I didn\u2019t know about her until college, but I immediately recognized her linguistic flaws. Mrs. Malaprop is a forceful character in a William Sheridan 1775 play called \u201cThe Rivals.\u201d She abuses the English language by using wrong words, often to the hilarity of her listeners.\u00a0The word \u201cmalapropism\u201d (mal a propos, \u201cout of place\u201d) has become familiar due to her character.\u00a0Examples she voiced were, \u201cAs headstrong as an\u00a0allegory\u00a0on the banks of the Nile.\u201d \u201cHe is the very\u00a0pineapple\u00a0of progress\u201d and \u201cMy\u00a0affluence\u00a0over my niece is very small.\u201d<\/p>\n

My mother had an extensive vocabulary, a quality I unconsciously emulated as I developed my love of storytelling and performance. Sometimes that led me into trouble, even as a teacher. I used, for example, the word \u201cconundrum\u201d instead of \u201cproblem\u201d to a senior class at Santa Monica High School and couldn\u2019t understand why all the boys were snickering. Later, I realized they imagined I meant \u201ccondom.\u201d<\/p>\n

As an adopted and much-awaited child, I was encouraged to talk a lot, and sometimes I found myself the object of gentle laughter. I used to think, for instance, that the words \u201cStand beside her, and guide her,\u201d in \u201cGod Bless America,\u201d referred to a Mister Stan and his friend Giter. My parents thought it was \u201ccute.\u201d\u00a0For years I extolled the virtues of my home state with, \u201cI love my California steak.\u201d<\/p>\n

As I matured, I learned to take a very brief pause before I misapplied certain words, but as I have now entered into the later part of life, they slip in more often.\u00a0The other day a friend asked me if I was going to cook a dish using my \u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026..\u00a0 She forgot the word \u201cblender,\u201d so I filled in \u201costracizer\u201d instead of \u201cOsterizer.\u201d A good chance for a laugh at my expense.<\/p>\n

My family had a great sense of humor, and I have developed a rather self-deprecating one.\u00a0I was planning to meet some friends recently at one of the several parks in Blaine County, and I wasn\u2019t sure I knew how to get there. As we arose from our seats, I said the following, asking for directions: \u201cI don\u2019t want to get there without knowing where I\u2019m going.\u201d Another chance for gentle laughter, including mine.<\/p>\n

Sometimes I even toss in phrases gleaned from the internet. While reading aloud a passage with the phrase \u201cWe are not saints,\u201d I intoned, \u201cWe are not robots.\u201d\u00a0After the laughter, I realized that I was citing several of those computer ID checks. Texting also does me in: an autocorrect word, \u201dstupid\u201d was substituted for \u201cstudly\u201d about my friend\u2019s husband.<\/p>\n

My excuse is that I keep my mind full and often remember useless things rather than important ones, like people\u2019s names.\u00a0So Annie, NOT Agatha, please forgive me. You ARE important to me, a simple older lady.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By JoEllen Collins One of my favorite literary characters probably appealed to me because, even as a girl, I sensed that I was afflicted with the same malady. Of course, I didn\u2019t know about her until college, but I immediately recognized her linguistic flaws. Mrs. Malaprop is a forceful character in a William Sheridan 1775 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7944,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"tdm_status":"","tdm_grid_status":"","_pvb_checkbox_block_on_post":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,22],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-15412","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-commentary","8":"category-on-lifes-terms"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15412","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15412"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15412\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15414,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15412\/revisions\/15414"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7944"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15412"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15412"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/woodriverweekly.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15412"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}